Email of the Day: September 23, 2009
From Mr. Ben S. of Cobble Hill, British Columbia, Canada.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009

The following email arrived through the Altamont web site's contact form.

Frankly, you have a SICK logo.I was wondering if I could get some free stickers for my skateboard, maybe a poster. Hey, if you want, you can even send me a small mammal. I'll take whatever you send. And I'll treasure it for always, and torment my friends with its sheer awesomeness. I really enjoy looking at your logo. It makes little colors appear out of my socks toes when I stare at it too long, and I find that very special. Please make my life more special! I beg of you! My favorite color will be determined by the color of the item you send. So, please don't leave me without a favorite color. All of my friends already have one, so I feel left out. I Love you guys, I really appreciate all your efforts and endeavors, and I would like to support you, as long as it doesn't cost me more than 18 cents, because thats all I can find in my couch cushions right now. DANG SPRING CLEANING! As I wait for your response, I will eagerly chew on my pet turtle named Oscar the Second. Thanks for your wasted time, and understanding nature. I have problems, and might turn into a insecticidal psychopath if you don't send stickers or a poster. Help out the world and send them already. It could save a butterflies VERY LIFE.

Mr. Ben S.
Cobble Hill
British Columbia, Canada

Ben,

You had me at "small mammal." The check, I mean the stickers are in the mail. P.S. You definitely have a career in creative writing ahead of you.

--Altamont Help Desk