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Email of the Day: January 22, 2009

January 22, 2009 by garry

The following email arrived today through the Altamont web site's contact form.

can i send my sponsor me tape to your company? and do i have to skate rails to get on your team?

From: rashaad

Hi,Rashaad.

Why, yes indeed, you do have to skate rails to get on Altamont. Exclusively. In fact, you have to pull the ever-elusive 1080 to fairy dance down a 50-stair rail on fruitboots while wearing a spandex Jazzercise outfit filled with sand, motor oil and salmonella-tainted peanut butter. Then and only then will you be man enough to be sponsored by the 'mont!

--Altamont Help Desk.


(Comments)

  1. said (5 years ago)

    despite his dumb bass second question, you should answer his first question. i'm sure tons of kids 'cross the internet universe would love to bombard you with sponsor tapes.
    here and now, let 'em know if it's worth trying.

    and they need to be smokin' a cig and drinkin' a coffee during the fairy dance. it's the only way to skate if you love Altamont

  2. said (5 years ago)

    Sean P. will be signing copies of his latest book "No Humor Allowed" at Barnes and Noble in Hamilton, Ontario, Canada on February 4, 2009 at 2:00 a.m.

  3. said (5 years ago)

    PLEASE READ!!! wow that was kinda dick. Like you guys didnt do stupid stuff like that when you were a little ass kid. Seriously you probably just made this kid wanna kill himself. haha. by the way all you see in todays up and coming skaters are just some faggots skating nothing but handrails. Thats not what skateboardings about. This little kid's just tryin to talk to a few people he looks up to. I'd like to see the dude who wrote that comment have an answer to this. I hope you read this shit. Otherwise im sorry i didnt know that altamont's just another one of those faggot stuck up skate companies. I look up to you fools too. you guys seriously let me down. Peace.

  4. said (5 years ago)

    "This little kid's just tryin to talk to a few people he looks up to."

    These "sponsor me" kids send the same "sponsor me" email to every company in the industry. The thought of skating for fun has probably never occurred to them. Shit gets old.

  5. said (5 years ago)

    dude! how did you know i work at Barnes&Noble?! weirrrrd.

  6. said (5 years ago)

    hahahaha yo im sure this fool was just fuckin around and im sure he knoes u guys were fuckin around back.i mean,hes gotta know that drew doesnt like to sack on handrails,which is why he frontside flicks over 18 stairs instead.

  7. said (5 years ago)

    ahahhaha fuck man i just had some of those fucking tainted austin peanutbutter crackers! and the kawala ones!!

  8. said (5 years ago)

    oh and sean p is a pussy ass bitch .... pts

  9. said (5 years ago)

    that's cute. you're cute. a/s/l?

  10. said (5 years ago)

    Yeah about fourteen years ago I was involved with a company that was pretty small back then but is now the biggest sell out of them all the skate brands.

    Back in the day the only way that you could even get a sticker from this company was to know somebody or go to a contest and catch one.

    Fucking underground smooth.
    Everybody wanted a part because it was the real thing, the embodiment of who the fuck we are and what the fuck we do.

    Sadly those days are gone. Now a days as I am waiting for my coffee, every sixteen year old girl with fake tits and a lap dog has got this fucking stamp all over them.

    It makes me sick. I used to get this gear free and now I won't even wear that garbage.

    Andrew hit the nail on the head when he talked about the kid at school back in the day that was the skater and you could tell by his look because it was his own gig.

    That was me and my friends twenty years deep.

    Now that look is Hannah Montana . I feel like those bastards in corporate suits fucking raped our style when it finally suited them.

    Don't give up who you are just because you don't like the original god gave you.

    I told you boy, you wernt cut out for this type of thing.

    Trade that there board skate in for a shovel and while you're busy digging your grave you can dig all of theirs too.

    Fuck em all

    J M Stoddard

  11. said (4 years ago)

    story made sense peace


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